37 Thoughts Every Glaswegian Has Faced Waking Up With "The Fear"
Everybody of drinking age, will have experienced it at some point in their life, (some more than once.) Where a big night out on the town, just kind of spirals out of control.
Although it’s only the morning after, when “The Fear” greets you like an old friend that you truly understand the meaning of the word hungover.
We bring you 37 thoughts every Glaswegian will have been faced with waking up with “The Fear”.
1. WHOAH! What happened to my walls? Wait this isn’t my house.
2. Where am I?
3. Whose couch is this I’m lying on?
4. Wait, whose clothes are these? I was definitely wearing different clothes when I left last night.
5. I’m sooo droothed, please let there be water next to the couch.
6. Nope. F sake, hate my life.
7. Hmm there is an enticing flower vase filled with cola coloured liquid next to the couch.
8. Seems perfectly harmless.
9. Oh God, what the f*** is that?
10. Is that gin, mixed with vodka and coke in a flower vase?
11. Wtf? What actually happened last night? Last thing I remember is dancing to Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” in Jumping Jax.
12. I really, really need a pee, but I’m afraid to go wandering around a randomer’s house.
13. Eww what’s this in my pocket?
14. Why is there a half king rib, jammed in my pocket?
15. Why have I got a vague memory of stashing a half king rib in my pocket away from the police?
16. No way, did the police stop me on Sauchiehall Street, whilst I was swapping clothes with a randomer?
17. Right that’s it, I’m never drinking again.
18. I’m afraid to look in the other pocket?
19. Three half packs of chewing gum, a half chewed paint brush lolly and, what’s this? A phone number written on toilet roll?
20. Who is Randall the toilet guy?
21. Aw no, have I swapped numbers with another toilet attendant guy.
22. Would defo explain my pockets.
23. Sh** did I end up going out partying with the toilet attendant guy?
24. Need to check my phone.
25. Sh** Sh** Sh** I can’t find my phone.
26. Ooft, is that my phone charging against the wall?
27. Oh my god, it is, how amazing.
28. Wooft, I can actually hear my heart pounding in my ears.
29. 97 missed calls.
30. 35 unread text messages.
31. 77 Facebook notifications.
32. Hmm think I’ll deal with them tomorrow when I’m less fragile.
33. Right time to go, I’m def not having an awkward hungover conversation with a randomer.
34. Head in the game. Better check my phone. Where am I?
36. Where the hell is Lenzie?