It’s always embarrassing looking back on your childhood and younger years, and marvelling at how ridiculous, human beings we actually were. Embrace the shame.

Seriously Why The F*** Did We Do That.

InfraRed

The torture of trying to swap ringtones, images or really any type of limited information using infra-red technology. Everybody remembers standing freezing to death in the playground with your pal, resembling some hypothermic conjoined twin as you exchanged a 4MB song which took 8 hours and 13 retries.

Polyphonic Ringtones

That horrific, metallic, 1980’s sounding din. Oh it’s the new Britney Spears song? Eh no it isn’t I’m afraid, it’s sounds like the mating call between a Transformer and a pencil sharpener. Congrats downloading it by the way. You’ve spent you’re entire and all future top ups on downloading charges, and formally agreed to sign your first born over to the ringtone company. Ps can you send me it?

Button Ups

Dear God, what an abomination, essentially designing clothes that not only leave you on a constant state of unease, fear of being stripped almost scud bollock naked in one brutal swoop. In a country like Scotland, where the weather is less than favourable, button ups meant you were almost constantly baltic, or if you attempted to wear them straight from the tumble drier. Searing pain and a lovely row of burn marks directly up your leg.

Kappa Le Coq

 

The picture says more than we ever need to. Favoured by drunks, jakes and dicks. Although urban legend said if you placed your hand strategically over the Kappa logo, it made the shape of woman’s lady parts.

Socks Over Trousers

Sadly, one of the GlasgowLiving team actually used to take part in this terrible practice, huge thick white sport socks tucked over your tracksuit bottoms, not for hill walking duties or crossing huge caverns of snow. Nope, all for teen fashion…Apparently.

Shaving Slits In Your Eyebrows

Ah yes, is there anything more gangster than a sixteen year old Scottish boy who in an attempt to look ghetto fabulous, has inadvertently shaved off a third of his eyebrow. He, instead of resembling a hip hop star, now appears to have been unlucky enough to fall asleep at a party.

Tram Lines On Your Head

Quite a recent monstrosity befallen of the hairdressing industry. Carving shapes into the side of (mainly) kids heads. Causing emotional and actual physical pain to your child, whilst simultaneously failing to realise they now look as if a tiny UFO has landed and went to town, creating a tiny crop circle. Way to go

Rave Paint / Neon Outfit

Who could have ever been shocked that dressing yourself up to resemble a Highway Code Illumination, would actually be a WTF moment later in life. Don’t forget, that the Rave Paint was apparently created using as many corrosive materials as they could find on the factory floor, leaving you with nice scabby skin long after the gig was over. Rave on.

Highlighted Hair

The Spice Boy era, the original beard trend itself (as in people blindly following trends like sheep), one day the beards will look back and have an empty feeling where their soul used to be. Anyway highlights, lowlights,and toners. Toffee, caramel and bleach. Nope not a disgusting, dangerous, sounding Starbucks menu, but actual colours you could dye your hair.

We hang our heads in shame.